Friends & Families
It takes a great deal of courage for our loved ones to look at their sexual behaviours, but here they are safe and there is help.
If we feel that someone we love has a compulsion towards sexual activity, which is either preoccupying them or leading to undesirable negative consequences, then you’re in the right place.
The paradox of this condition is that if the consequence alone were enough, your loved one would’ve stopped on their own. Sexual compulsion is not just a bad habit, nor is it the result of poor self-control or of poor moral values. It’s about the person’s deep feelings of worthlessness and shame, even if we think they should feel love.
Regrettably a carefully researched course of recovery by you, for you friend or partner, will almost certainly have the opposite effect, with the sufferer rejecting your help, either from denial or the shame from being told what to do.
So an alternative way might be to listen to the suffering person talk about their emotional experiences, without judgement or making comments. Sometimes that’s hard to do, but the aim is to allow the person to feel acknowledge in what they feel and not judged about feeling the wrong thing.
What do I do now?
We offer a diagnosis tool so you can see the scope of sexual behaviours and their consequences.
Get in touch
Phone or text our helpline on 07748 168164 to leave a message on our voicemail.
Email us at [email protected]. We will get back to you as soon as we can.
Attend an SAA meeting
In the UK, there are well over 150 SAA meetings each week, on line, in person or by telephone, which allows connection with other fellows to share the message of recovery.
Attend other support meetings
One place you can go is to COSA, designed for either children of, or co-dependents of sex addicts. Whilst we don’t endorse their work, you may find it a safe place to share your experiences of living with somebody who suffers from sexual compulsion.
All Meetings are different, with some created for specific groups such as LGBTQ+ or women. We recommend asking others which meetings they attend. We encourage discussion with one another, to exchange phone numbers and to take temporary sponsorship.
Check out our programme literature, which can be accessed for free online or ordered through the SAA website Shop. There are a number of starter pamphlets and our main text is Sex Addicts Anonymous - The Green Book.
We get together at our annual Recovery Day in London - and at local SAA Recovery Days - check the calendar for event dates.
Sex addicts of every gender, sexual orientation, race and belief system are welcome in SAA. There are no fees, forms or waiting lists. We practise strict anonymity and confidentiality and we don’t oppose other forms of therapy or treatment – we just offer our experience and you’re free to take it or leave it. It's a simple programme and it is working for us.