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  • Kieron's story

    Hi my names Kieron and I'm a sex addict.

    My story began with an impoverished and violent upbringing. I lived with my brother, mum and her alcoholic, abusive boyfriend. I witnessed a lot of physical violence towards her and was also a victim of this myself. I was small in stature and frightened a lot of the time. My life was normal for me as I assumed all kids of my age grew up like this. I had the misfortune of seeing my mum having sex on numerous occasions and, again, I thought this was normal. At aged 7 I was abandoned by my mum and again at age 10.

    What it was like

    When I was age 14 I discovered magazines with female images in them and subsequently became fixated on them. At aged 15 I discovered masturbation and was also fixated on doing this compulsively and daily. 

    I was very fearful of people at this time as I was bullied a lot in school and I  used porn magazines and videos to sooth my pain. I didn't know how to approach girls so I just objectified them and stored the images in my mind for sexual gratification. 

    At aged 19 I had a girlfriend which, for me, meant only 1 thing; I could have regular sex with someone. I could never imagine myself loving someone and really caring about them, only the sex interested me. This continued into every other relationship I had which included constant cheating and lying to satisfy my sexual needs and sooth my internal pain. This pain came from an inability to deal with life, to trust people and to form good friendships and relationships. I was angry, hurting emotionally and unable to let anyone in and be close to me. 

    What I did about it

    I finally came into the rooms at SAA aged 42. I had cheated again and lost my girlfriend, son, home, job and car. This made me realise I'd had enough of myself and these destructive behaviours which hurt everyone who cared about me. This was my rock bottom. 

    Since then I found a sponsor to work the steps and gave myself fully to the programme. This has been life changing for me. Now I can love and care about myself and others. I can live a "normal" day dealing with people in a positive way and "doing the next right thing". This is part of my everyday routine as well as prayer, meditation, fellowship calls and reading. 

    What it's like now

    I am now living back home with my girlfriend and son. I have a great job, a car and better emotional, spiritual and financial health. 

    Lastly, I am so grateful to SAA for helping me to change my life and that of others. It really does work if you work it! 

    If you think you might benefit from the SAA fellowship, or if you simply want to find out more, meetings can be found here or you may call 07585 091502 or write to us here for more information.

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    Last updated: May 17th, 2023