We recognise that sexual addiction is not a gender specific issue and an increasing number of women are identifying their sex addiction. In spite of this fact, you may find yourself the only woman in the room at an SAA meeting. This does not mean that you do not belong or that you won't find help in this program. It simply means that you are a member of a brave, trail-blazing minority and can be an example for other women to follow.

It is easy to suppose that the men in the group represent a threat, a temptation or would not be interested in your difficulties. It is important that we all bear in mind SAA is not a place to meet sexual partners: we are all there to get well. 

Built into the programme are boundaries around sexual behaviour which are designed to keep all members safe. We have found that when we all work the programme and maintain our own boundaries the meeting is a safe place where we can support each other in our recovery.

When looking for a sponsor we have found it best to avoid anyone who may be a potential trigger. For example a heterosexual woman is safest not working with a heterosexual man, instead another woman or a gay man would be advisable. On the other hand, a woman who identifies herself as gay may feel safer with a man rather than a woman.

When exchanging numbers with other members for fellowship we find that these same boundaries keep us safe.

There is a strong network of women in SAA across the UK who support and sponsor each other. There is no reason for any woman to be isolated, even if there are no other women at your meeting. There are plenty of chances for SAA women to get together at retreats or recovery days and we now have an annual women only recovery day. The fellowship is always looking for new ways to make newcomers, especially those who might feel they are in a minority, feel more comfortable.

We recommend that you attend the meetings with an open mind. You will see that you share many similarities with the members of your group and, eventually, you will be able to share your own experience, strength and hope from your own unique perspective. And when the next woman newcomer walks through the door you will be there to greet them.

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